Sunday, December 29, 2013

Our Angel

There was a woman who had the patience of an angel. 

Our Angel had a beautiful baby boy

Who grew up to like rock music just like his Momma.

Our Angel  had a husband & family & friends who all loved her

Then the boy met a girl.

He took the girl home to meet his Mom

Then the two moms got to meet

Soon the boy & girl were engaged.

Then, our Angel got sick. 

Our Angel looked forward to the wedding 

Our Angel fought hard and got better.

Our Angel danced with her Son at his wedding.

The boy & the girl went on a honeymoon 

Our Angel waited for a baby to be born.

We were blessed with a baby boy

The new baby boy looked just like his Daddy when he was born.

Our Angel watched him everyday while his Mama and Daddy went to work.

We celebrated the baby's 1st birthday 

Our Angel was always there to support her son. She was so proud of him.

Our Angel loved the holidays - especially spoiling her grand babies 

She loved me like her own daughter 

Our Angel babysat so we could have date nights & would ask us when we were making her more babies 

Our Angel got sick again.

She couldn't watch her babies anymore, but we still went to visit.

I knew this time was different, so when our Angel lost her hair so did we.

We celebrated Mother's  Day

No matter what she always had the energy for her babies

Our Angel continued to enjoy life with her family 

Then the doctors told us the Chemo didn't work.

I promised my Mother in Law I would always love & take care of her boys. 

Our Angel & her son were forever faithful SF 49er Fans.

We celebrated the baby's 2nd Birthday.

Then heaven gained a new Angel.

"My Angel, My Heart, My Rock"

The Son found the perfect way to honor her Memory when the niners built a new stadium.

Our Angel now has a beautiful view of the City of Angels. 

14 Races in 2014 in memory of Our Angel because every second of every hour of everyday we miss you Mom.

It's not the same without you, we are forever blessed to have had you even if the time we had was far too short. 

No More Cancer.  #14in2014

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Food, Family & Fitness

Nothing exciting to report - busy as ever with family, working out and eating lol.

Christmas was quiet & low key this year. The absence of my mother in law weighed heavy on our shoulders as it was our first Christmas without her.

Although we ate more than we should we didn't go too crazy. The hubby and I are taking advantage of time off together to work out with eachothers despite    both having sinus colds. Today we signed up for our gyms fitness challenge. I figure the extra motivation couldn't hurt and there is a cash prize !  I also set up a FB group for some of my mommy friends and I to motivate each other to wo and eat healthier in the new year. 

Made sure tonight I made a dinner to help us get over our sinus colds - home made soup from pork broth and Japanese noodles with fresh garlic, ginger and green onions- my version of ramen.  The ginger, onion & garlic should boost our immune system and it tastes super yummy. 

I also got crafty with my running shirts today to show I'm running for more than just fitness. I think about my loved ones a lot on the treadmill - sometimes it makes me very emotional but it feels good to let it out on the treadmill - running is def helping me work it out in a healthy way.  Running has taken on such new meaning  for me since I decided to fundraise for LLS. 

Now enjoying a quiet evening thinking of meal planning ideas, planning out work outs and watching Dispicable Me with my lil angel baby ❤️

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

What CANCER looks like

Want to see what cancer looks like?

These are two moving and beautiful tributes.

 Below a photo also of my mother in law 3 days before she passed.

CANCER IS WEAK despite all that it does because it CAN NEVER destroy the LOVE.

Can't stop - won't stop!!

Good morning!

Feeling much more positive this last week as I am channeling all of me into something bigger than me - it genuinely feels like I was meant to do this. Silly nonsense also seems to wash off me - I don't have time for you nonsense or drama I'm on a mission! A mission to run A LOT & fundraise and raise awareness for disease prevention! 

Got the ball rolling too on many different aspects of the 14 in 2014 mission.

Signed up to attend the LLS  2014 Blood Cancer Conference.

Will be attending the LA Fit EXPO

Started writing to sponsors regarding setting up a 5k in mother in laws honor but need to really find a location and other people to help me plan the event to benefit St.Jude.

In other news I made contact with the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and they have some great wats to help me train and fundraise for them.

I have been working out mostly doing Zumba as I was using up a groupon. I love groupon! So many great gyms and fitness classes I couldn't afford to go to often made super affordable. WO don't have to be boring - find something you love! 

My schedule flips at work today which means I now will try to hit the gym before work a couple times a week. 4:30am is going to be my regular alarm time once the holidays have passed.

I also need to find a printer or custome apparel company to help me promote myself through apparel when I work out. 

So much to do!  Seems like nearly everything has to wait til the New year but at least I have got a little bit of a head start.

If you know if someone that can help in 5k sponsorships or with custom fitness apparel please let me know!

Make everyday count people - everyday we are alive is a blessing!

Photos below are me post work out last night - I worked 7-6 then did my Zumba b4 home. Tired ? Yes! But what's motivating me? Training to fundraise for cancer research ...

 && my beloved MIL. The photo of her is at my sons second birthday party, she was holding him after his nap. She passed away 3 days later on what would have been her last day of radiation but her heart physically gave out. They already had told us the chemo didn't work but they were hoping to extend her life - they failed. This is why we NEED better cancer treatments. 


Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Boo you FaceBook 2013 in review

So it's almost the end of the year which means Facebook has some new feature where it pulls what it determines to be your year's highlights and compiles them in a cute way  share. Everytime I see that on my page I hate it more. I can't help it - 2013 was the worst year in my life. So to think of it in review, here is what I think of.

December 2012 - Right before New Years the photo of my hubby and I in Vegas looking happy and young and how beautiful my hair was and I was feeling better after a stressful year and how I couldn't wait to embrace a fresh new year to push towards my goals.

January - the sudden diagnosis of my mother in law having cancer again and having her feeding tube inserted again.

February - canceling our vacation to see my family in England (we haven't seen more of them since 09/10 and only my my mom has met our son)

April - the day I saw my uncle and father in law with shaved heads and then cut off my long hair and donated it to locks of love and them my husband and friend shaved their heads also in support of my mother in law.

June - my sons 2nd birthday 

July - the day my mother in law died, 3 data after my sons birthday and 2 days after I had returned to work. I thought this was the worst day of my life.

October - our 3rd wedding anniversary when I thought we were getting back to normal - or as normal as we could be

October - the day I completed the Long Beach Half Marathon and I conceived #14in2014

October - the day my husband had his car accident. He could've died but his guardian angel was watching over him. 

This was the actual worst day of my life. This was the day I realized how deeply our life had changed and we weren't anywhere as near to normal as I had previously hoped.

There were other moments in this year that I remember ...

Announcements of pregnancies 

The birth of a baby

The loss of a baby

Finding out someone named  their child after me - that was one of the best moments if the year. 

But through & through the best part of the year day in day out, was my son.

Since he was born my mother in law, or Grandma as he knew her, watched him while we worked or when we need a night off so we could have a date night. Grandma lived for her babies, her patience, love and kindness knew no bounds. Perhaps that is her legacy  - when I struggle for patience I think of her , breathe deep and somehow my patience grows. I know her grandchildren are what kept her fighting everyday, i never new how true it was that children are a blessing until 2013, from my my 2013 all of the best moments were related to the children in my life.

I wrote this last week when I was feeling blue. The blue passed, but if this is a blog of my journey than it should be posted. 

Photo shown is of grandma with her grand baby Mother's Day 2013. Already in treatment but always time and energy for the loves if her life- her grand kids


Monday, December 9, 2013

Grateful tonight for my health

It's funny how all consuming grief can be. The hole that a loved one passing leaves behind can be so huge that it can overwhelm you. You can't fill the hole with food, alcohol, tv or even working out. The distraction is only temporary and when it's over the grief is still right there in front of you. But at least with working out there is no guilt or shame after. I totally failed at one of my 2013 goals which was to stop comfort eating with carbs.  2014 will be another opportunity to succeed at that. I will learn from my failures - 2014 I pledge to use my training to manage my stress. A healthy outlet that will benefit my mind and body.

  My loved ones have been on my mind all day since I created this blog and when I left my Zumba class in the cold and the dark my grief was there waiting for me. Such a buzz kill but never the less I made the most of my day and killed my work out.  I also reached out to start making connections for my #14in2014 challenge - I must focus on those positives. There is a long road ahead of me to reach the end of this personal challenge & I'm sure it will be emotional as instead of ignoring the grief I will face it head on. But cancer patients can't ignore their disease either they have to suck it up and go through treatments that temporarily can feel worse than the disease. 

Before you go to sleep tonight take a moment to be grateful - for you health and your family. Don't take it for granted, we only have one body and we must take care of it.

My 1st Official Blog

December 9th 2013

I wonder who will read this?

So I started a year ago with a FaceBook page and an Instagram to share my experiences, photos, recipes, thoughts relating to my life as a 1st time mother trying to navigate her way around working full time, keeping her own identity and discussing issues that are important to me.

When my son was 6 months old I decided I needed to get back into running (my running journey to be shared in another blog at another time). I was so sleep deprived, still carrying a lot of baby weight and struggling to find and maintain balance in my life. I decided Jan 1st 2012 that I did everything else tired, so why couldn't I continue training for races and run tired? So I did... slowly, but I did it.  I think my first post-baby Half Marathon was my biggest achievement in some ways, because I got off the couch and demanded more of myself and by doing so I hope to encourage and motivate my son to push himself when he gets older. I hope he will see me and his dad trying to be healthier (and failing at times) and that he will learn from all of our successes and failures but no matter what always aim for a healthier, cleaner lifestyle. At the end of that half marathon when I saw my husband and son at the finish line I cried, there was no better feeling than in that moment when despite the tiredness, aches and pains and time away from my family that I had done it. I had managed to "do it all". Being a parent was just a part of who I was, and with some time management, organization and motivation I COULD do it all, although not all at once and I could still do the things that made me truly happy and did not have to lose my personal identity.

Running is cheaper than therapy and so is writing a blog, but why do both? 

These days when I run it is not just to be healthy, it is not just to do something I enjoy but I actually feel that I NEED it. It helps me process all of everything in my head which is constantly spinning and thinking of 15 different things at once.  I decided recently that I wanted to run 14 races in 2014 - this *lightbulb* of an idea occurred to me shortly after completing the Long Beach Half Marathon in 2013. I think I might have been on my "runners high" -  still though,  long after the idea stayed. I started signing up for races and hashtagging my posts #14in2014. After all, if my dear friend Barco could run a 100 marathons  why couldn't I do just 14 events in 1 year.  So that is how 14 in 2014 came about, simply because I had 1 crazy thought after a great racing event.  It became rather than why do it, but why not do it? && in my typical nature that doing 1 thing, on in this case 14 things, became not enough and I have decided to up the ante.

My 14 in 2014 Challenge is a personal challenge, but I will be dedicating it to my Aunt Sue (well really she was my moms best friend since she was knee high to a grasshopper) and my Mother in Law Janet. Both of these ladies were remarkable women, they in their own way were my other mothers. Both of their passing's were related to lengthy fights with cancer and long term treatments which resulted in their bodies and immune systems being tired, so in in the end their passing was not from the cancer but as a result of doing what they could to fight it.  The loss of these women has forever changed me. I feel that I NEED to do something to honor their memory and hopefully raise awareness and hopefully raise a few dollars for treatment research.  I firmly believe in that prevention is better than cure, preventing cancer is just as important as treating it.

So that is why I have started my blog, to find a place to empty my thoughts and to show my training and progress in reaching this goal. As a former Team in Training participant and mentor I will end with one final thought, whatever I go through on this journey running these events it will never EVER compare to what a cancer patient goes through. We need better treatment options people so that we don't have to continue losing those that we love to this disease.

Thank you for reading.